You may make mistakes in your most intimate relationships that doom them. You may think of sex as intimate, but there is more to it than that. When someone talks about your most intimate relationships, they are talking about the ones that are closest to your heart, and sex may or may not be a part of them. Your relationship with your spouse is included, of course, but this also may mean the relationships you have with your children, your best friends, and you parents? All of which have nothing to do with sex and are all about being open, vulnerable, And honest. That is what intimate means.
When you get close to someone and you feel the relationship has been solidified, perhaps through marriage or just through time or blood relationship, you may begin to take that relationship for granted. Intimate relationships are not something to be taken lightly, and they need work to sustain and thrive. You may think that once you have gotten married that you no longer have to be romantic and have fun together, but that is not true. Those things will make your marriage strong and lasting. If you just dump issues on each other, you will end up divorced. Most intimate relationships work this way. They need to be fed to survive.
You also have to make honesty the main ingredient in your most intimate relations. Without it, trust will be lost, and without trust, you do not have much left. You must feel that the one you love can keep your confidences, will never do anything to harm you, and will also protect you from the harm of others. Intimate relationships are often formed on trust, and these are the people that we trust with the deepest of thoughts, feelings, and ideas. If we can not trust that they will protect those things, we can not trust. If you lose trust, you know exactly what this means.
Some in intimate relationships make the mistake of making a spouse or best friend a dumping ground. All they talk about is problems, and do not bother to see if the other person needs someone to talk to for a while. You always want to be there for your friend or your spouse, but you have to be there for them too. If you call a friend only when you want to vent or cry, but then never let them talk about themselves or what is going on in their lives, they will stop taking your calls after a while. Your spouse will see you as nothing more than a source of stress, and even the deepest of loves and friendships can begin to die.
When it comes to family and children, make time to be with them that is not centered around problems and necessary get togethers. If you only see your parents for Christmas, you may find that you have anything but intimate relationships with them. This can be by choice, but if you love your parents, you have to call them, check in, and let them know you appreciate them. Your children need your attention and your love, and they should be a priority rather than something you attend to when everything else is done. Without this attention, they will have problems in their own intimate relationships down the road because they will not know that they are supposedly to be like.